By Andrew Wong      25th June 2011 中文版
Number Psychology and Energy Psychology  Articles Series

Developing Children and Developing Organizational Members

NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming)

SF (Solution Focus)

EP (Energy  Psychology)

NP(Number Psychology)

 

 

   

         
 

A 10-yr old boy lately exhibits a lot of strange behaviors. He becomes easily frightened. He hides herself in the room. If pressured to go to the school, he often quarrels with his classmates.

The mother is deeply concerned and seeks help from the undersigned.

The initial coaching conversation with the mother brings up the following aspects of the parenting method used, which is commonly applied by most. And such approach, among others, contributes to the child’s behavioral problems.

This article discusses more the parenting approach, and not the healing and coaching work, using Number Pscyhology and Energy Psychology, on both the child and the mother.

Similarity is made on developing organizational members, or unleashing their potentialities.

With her best intention for the good development of the child, the mother admits she often loses her temper and punishes the boy severely. She said she does not demand the boy to score top in the academic class, but stresses the importance of character building and instill good value system.

Sound logical. We cannot not agree on the importance of character building and good value system.

At the same time, is logic all there is to develop people. A similar point was raised in my previous article “Safety Disasters and Organizational Learning”, http://www.360q.com/NLP/EnergyPsychology27.htm.

Note: using Number Psychology analysis, certain characteristic and personalities of both the mother and the child are made, which are to be further validated during the coaching conversation. Hence some clues are made on what possible behaviors are adopted by the mother and the child. The mother confirms that her strategy to cope with life is to use strong will power, and she has achievement orientation. She also agrees with my analysis that her child learning strategy is different, he prefers soft approach, sometime taking a while to take action, or in-decisive. Achievement to him is not so important, but he seeks stability and experimentation.

Without realizing differences in personalities and learning strategies, clashes and frustration often occur in interaction: mother and child, organization members, management and staff etc.

Instilling Value-system

Coach : “In what way you are mad with your child about how he spends his pocket money in the school?”

Mother : “He buys all the junk stuff: stickers, paper toys, wasting the money. I need to instill to him good value system. I explained (or is it lecturing him?) that if he keeps spending money on these worthless things, there is no more money left for his higher education. “

With good intention on the part of the parents, the above is a typical parenting approach. It sounds logical, and it seems a good rationale – the teaching on good value-system.

We as adults, we also make decision everyday – what to buy, what to spend money on. Is it not true that a lot of things we buy, on the hindsight is of little value. Ten years from now, looking back at today we may regret on a lot of money spent on things not worthy of its value.

So we are constantly learning.

So is the child.

For the child to spend money on so called junk stuff, a few learning steps are involved.

  • His appreciation of certain things
  • His decision making to spend money on the things
  • His action to acquire the things
  • His satisfaction (or not) on the action taken.

Since the child is learning, as parents we should help him in his developmental path. Help him build his self esteem that a) he has appreciation of things (though not worthy in the adults’ opinion). Or do you want your child to have no appreciation of anything, no desire of anything in life? You will be dead worried if he behaves such. b) praise him that he is learning to make decision, c) he has taken action on his decision, d) go alone with him that he seems to be satisfied with what he acquired.

When his self esteem is built and reinforced, parent can then coach him on what other options, besides “those stuff” can be of greater values. Then the child learns fasters, he learns from his action, not lectures from the parents.

Furthermore, what are the effects on such lecture “that if he keeps spending money on these worthless things, there is no more money left for his higher education? No education, you have to be a beggar on the street!”

We instill fear in the child. We put pressure on the child.

What belief system get generated in the child mind, subtly, and un-consciously :

“Money is difficult to get. “ “In order to survive in the future, one should not enjoy life now and buy what you likes” “Future is full of difficulties” “I am guilty as I make serous wrong decision that can affect my future and my family future” “ I must save every penny for my future” …..

We are not helping the child to manage the power of Now, but project him into the future of uncertainty, anxiety, and fear.

How can the child learn under such circumstances? His mind is full of negative images.

Now, we switch back to organizational learning.

In my previous article “Safety Disasters and Organizational Learning” http://www.360q.com/NLP/EnergyPsychology27.htm , management reaction is quite similar to the above mentioned poor parenting. With good intention, they are reactive. They instill high Safety value through training, management speeches, slogans. They highlight the consequences of poor safety. They fill up the mind of the organizations with negative images.

The management reacts harshly to minor incidents, like the above parents. They reward the staff handsomely when million hours achieved without Lost Time Injury. On the other hand they instill fear and discipline to maintain the safety records.

Being reactive, they have no more energies left to examine the underlying behavioral drivers – the bottom of the iceberg : the belief system, emotions and psychology of all parties concerned, including the management themselves, what personalities and what learning strategies.

On Integrity – Character Building

Coach: “You mention about good character building. How is that related to your child?”

Mother : “He tells lies. Instead of using the pocket money to buy food at the canteen during recess time, he uses the money to buy junk stuff. I discover his drawer full of junk stuff, yet he denies it, with stories that those are given by his friends.”

Learning to cope with life is basic human instinct.

When the child hasn’t leaned many other choices in life, he has limited choice. He only knows he likes certain things without realizing or experiencing other wonderful things like appreciating little animals, or music etc., and his limited choice is to use money to acquire the things he likes, so called junk stuff. With such limited choice, he identifies his self worth with the “junk stuff”. If such identity is threatened, he has to defend it, by lying.

This is not a moral issue. This is a psychological issue.
(Nether is corruption a moral issue, but psychological issue, a topic for the next discussion)

Good parenting is to help the child first by assuring his self esteem, not criticizing his integrity, that his limited choice of identification of self with the “junk” stuff, is a beginning step towards more choices and maturity, that his lying is his limited identification of self-worth. Help increase his choices, help expand his identification of self.

Similar psychology is at work in the workplace. When the pressure is high on safety discipline, people would not dare to report safety incidents, due to fear of punishment. They cheat, they lie. They hide the problems. In the end, things just explode.

Good organizational learning is to understand the basic human drivers and help balance the mental, emotional and pyschological blockages– both the management and the staff, so that hidden potentials can be well manifested to the desired visions of the organization.

End.

EP Coach, Andrew

Introducing EP Coaching to Corporation


Energy Psychology Coaching Service for Corporation (6-8 months follow up services)

A new service is launched - "NP-Your Potentialities Report Writing Service"

Number Psychology training for the public  refer : “Number Psychology” (English), "數字心理學" (Chinese), with Participants feedback (English), 学员学习心得 (Chinese)

Energy Psychology training for the public  refer : “Energy Psychology (English), "能量心理學" (Chinese), with Cases  (English), 处理过的案例 (Chinese)

Or, your are welcome to communicate with your HR Director / manager to bring this training to your organization / corporation.

Numerology (Number Psychology, helps to get more information for effective coaching like the above. Unlike many profiling tools used by corporation / companies (more expensive too), it is a much simpler and effective tool, with revelation of more hidden messages.

Energy Psychology helps to balance the negative energies.

End.

This coach is most grateful to the hundreds of clients (public and corporate) who provide greater learning for the coach in the coaching sessions, thus gaining more experience and insights on what and how coaching works. As a result, this coach is more ready to provide services to the public and corporation more effectively.

While the public continues to benefit from the one-to-one coaching carried out (refer Energy Psychology Coaching Service, and [Money Clinic] Coaching Service) , the corporation and organization can benefit from customized training on Mindset Emotion and Energy Psychology Training to develop internal skills as masterful coaches. (refer Specially for Organization / Corporation). Currently a long term contract is ongoing with a corporation on one to one coaching to the management, and developing them to be masterful internal coaches, thus creating a coaching culture.

Articles Related to Number Psychology and Energy Psychology application

  Introducing EP Coaching to Corporation In Search of Correct Human Behavior and Mindsets in Organization  
  What are missing in Organizational Learning? Safety Disasters and Organizational Learning  
  Bill Gates and his Potentialities / 中文版 Sony Vs Samsung  
  Vision Energies [6] / 中文版 Expression Energy [3] / 中文版  
  Assault at KFC Outlet / 中文版 Projection of Fear  
  Distant Money and Loving Wife / 中文版 Un-acceptance in Relationship / 中文版  
  Surgeon, Stress and Peace
Deeply Buried Fears  
  “Sacrificing for others” – A virtue or Psychological Problem? Excessive Obligation and Gratitude  
  How to apply EP conversation at Work? / 中文版 Analysis of different Coaching Approaches / 中文版  
  A New Theory To Share / 中文版 The Body Never Lies / 中文版  
  To Quit the Job or Not? Unbalanced Potentials Manifestation  
  Enjoy Sorrow and Pain / 中文版
Nine Different Definition of Love / 中文版
 
  Brother’s Concern of Sister and OL / 中文版 Suicide - Individual and Organization  
  The Diamond Cutter and Energy Psychology Developing Children and Developing Organizational Members  
  Feedback from a N-report Client A Good Child is Good News?  
  Care and Protection Bury Potentials / 中文版 A "Positive" Manager / 中文版  
  Story of a Soul / 中文版 12 Coaching Cases in One day / 中文版  
  Overly Concern creates Negative Energy / 中文版 Introducing NP/EP Coaching to Political Organization / 中文版  
  Group Coaching using NP and EP Not Knowing One is Lost  
  “I must be strong!” (Positive Thinking Backfires) I will Take the Whole World  
Tomorrow Never Comes  中文版 Unhappiness Due to Non-alignment with Inner Calling
  Balancing Ambitions / Childhood Imprint  中文版 Problems are Learning Opportunity In Disguise  
  Balancing Perfectionism     中文版 When Solutions are the Problems  中文版  
  Unconscious Self-sabotaging Pattern Limiting Belief - the Danger, yet Unknown  
  Some Concepts on Energy Psychology Coaching An Angry Mother and A Corporation  
  Energy Psychology and Personality When New Zealand is beautiful, what can be not so beautiful?  
  The Language of Energy Number Psychology Vs Fortune Telling
 
  From Linkedin Group Discussion to Organizational Learning EP Coaching and Organizational Learning  
  Lovely little girl True Self And Relationship  
  In Search of Lost Emotion (Political Emotion too) 中文版    
Training and Coaching Services to Corporation / Public  
  Introducing EP Coaching to Corporation  
  Energy Psychology Coaching Service for Corporation (6-8 months follow up services)  
  Number Psychology Training (1-day)  
  Energy Psychology Training (1-day)  
  Unleashing Organizational Potentials (2-days)  
  Energy Psychology Coaching Service (one on one)    
  [Money Clinic] Coaching Service (one on one)
Number Psychology Report Writing Service
   
       
         

Return to 

NLP NLP SF EP Articles

KL Energy Psychology  Coaching / Healing Community


| QuaSyLaTic Learning System |

New Home | Old Home | Articles | Slides | K-Objects | Investment Knowledge | Life Planning | Communities Building | BookstoreSite Map | Join | Contact Us  | About 360q
Copyright © 2000-2008 360q.com QuaSyLaTic . All Rights Reserved. andrew@360q.com